fleet collection review!

A few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to be one of two winners of an Instagram contest hosted by Fleet Collection! I won a $50 gift card, and I used it to buy the dress I'm going to talk about! Fleet Collection is a great brand that specializes in simple, elegant clothing. A lot of their dresses come in a huge range of colors, which is perfect for someone like me who can't get enough of pastels. Ordinarily, I would have immediately bought something mint (they had about four dresses that I was seriously debating on getting). However, this time around, I decided to go with something a little bit different. Their Etiquette dress had just come back into stock when I received my gift card, and I couldn't say no to the gorgeous lace collar. 

I love the detail on the lace--it has kind of a Victorian feel to it, which is one of my favorite things to find in a piece of clothing. It's not something you encounter very much, especially now that festival styles are coming in for the summertime.

My dress arrived pretty quickly. When I took it out of the package, I was pleasantly surprised by the weight of the fabric. It's heavy enough to give it a nice drape while still being pleasant in the Arizona heat, and the inside is lined with some adorable, silky red polka-dot fabric. It was true to size and very comfortable! I couldn't wait to wear it, so I put it on after work and went to the grocery store. It would definitely work for more formal occasions, however. ;)

I especially love that this dress is fit and flare, because the definition on the waist is very nice without being constricting and the skirt fluffs out just right. Another bonus--it wasn't too long for me! At 5'3, sometimes I hit that awkward territory between the cute longer vintage-y length that works for me with some skirts and actually just too long. Thankfully, I didn't have to worry about it!

It's basically an elegant dress that can be dressed up or down, which is something I personally feel like everyone should own at least one of. The collar isn't sewn down, so you can flip it up and tuck any color cardigan under it for an instant pop while still getting the full effect of the lace.

Of course, now I am tempted to go back for some of those other dresses I saw. They have silhouettes and fabrics to suit almost any taste, and as I said before, I can't resist anything that comes in mint or lavender.

I was personally very impressed with my experience. Thank you again, Fleet Collection, for the chance to own one of the cutest black dresses I've ever seen.

Shoes: Chelsea Crew 

Necklace: Thrifted

Headband: Forever 21

passports and printed blouses

My passport arrived a day after my birthday--talk about some serious lucky timing. I wasn't expecting it for at least a couple more weeks!

Marcus and I went to Phoenix together to get them done awhile back. We have plans to travel in the near future, and I was long overdue for an updated passport (this was his first one!) so we decided to get it over with. I was excited that they let us smile for the pictures, since I'd heard that wasn't necessarily allowed. The contrast in the photos they ended up using was really high, so we both came out looking sunburned. Oh, well! I'm beyond excited to finally have my current passport.

Semi-related: how cute is this blouse? I saw it on Modcloth awhile ago, but somehow I missed it and it ended up selling out. I actually originally bought the dress in the same pattern, but unfortunately it didn't work for me and I sent it back. When I saw the top on eBay a few months later, I was really excited--more so when I won the auction for twelve dollars. I have a penchant for printed clothing, so I take all the deals I can find!

In other news, my hair is finally getting longer, which excites me in many ways but is also becoming inconvenient. Arizona weather is not really conducive to long hair past the month of March. Most days, I wear it up, especially because we spend a lot of time outside at work while the kids play. It's sort of nice, though--once in awhile, I wear it down and am pleasantly surprised by the growth. I can finally do a sock bun without having to put a thousand bobby pins in the back for support! Summer also seems to be a time when all sorts of cute hair tutorials come out, so I'm looking forward to being able to participate in some. I have not yet found a flower crown to wear (evidently those are all the rage), so for now I will settle for working on pin curls and twisted updos. I'll let you know how those work out! 

Top: Wanders of the World Top (sold out!)

High-waisted shorts: Forever 21

Flats: Gap 

long time, no sea!

(Sorry, I had to. It's been a long week, and I enjoy puns far too much to ever let something like that go.)

Today was my first go using the new tripod. Marcus was nice enough to sit at the park reading his book while I twirled around on the bridge and tried not to fall into the lake. I was so excited to finally wear my new dress! Lately, I've noticed myself gravitating more and more toward longer skirts. For awhile, I wouldn't wear anything longer than your standard Forever 21-length dresses, so it's sort of interesting how much that's changing. As someone with a stature of only about 5'3, this is slightly alarming because anything below the knee tends to be hit or miss for me. If a skirt falls past my calves, there's a good chance it wasn't meant for me (or it was, and just I need to find myself a tailor!)

Luckily, I don't think this particular dress is going to need any kind of alterations. I'm very fond of how long it is even though it originally took some getting used to. It's very pretty in person (runs a full size small, though!), and as anyone who knows me is well aware, I'll take any nautical garments I can get my hands on. This was a welcome addition to my collection. I'd been after it since I first discovered Modcloth, but it recently went on a flash sale and I finally decided to quit fawning over it online and just get the thing already. Now I just need to find a way to help transition it into colder weather...I'm thinking white tights and some ankle boots, but given that the dress is long and full, I'm not sure how well that's going to translate. We'll see!

Experimenting with the tripod will hopefully be a fruitful endeavor. Now that I don't have to balance my giant camera on tabletops anymore, a lot of doors have been opened in terms of where and when I can take pictures. I love browsing other people's photography for ideas--it's one of those hobbies I think a lot of people have common ground on. Pictures are just fun to take! Personally, I'm a fan of playing with colors. I can't wait to take this thing out for a spin downtown or to the mountains when I go visit my brother. It'll probably come with me to Seattle, too, although I'm not sure how effective it will be to set up shop in the middle of Pike's Place. I got enough odd looks as it is from the occasional jogger this afternoon--I don't think my confidence is quite ready for anything more just yet!

Dress: Modcloth - Sea Shanty Singing Dress
Red flats: Old Navy
Bow: Made by me! 

Oh, yes, and Marcus joined me for a picture after I finished. Fun story: he originally wanted to try recreating the World War II sailor picture, only he wanted to be the one getting dipped. We tried twice, and the resulting photos looked like I was trying to assault him. Also, I kept dropping him. For future reference, I'm not a reliable foundation if you want to be dipped or dunked or otherwise tilted towards the ground.

We still had fun, though, even though we mutually agreed to never try to get into team Olympic figure skating.

:)

{ an outfit and an outburst }

[ warning: this post is long, and expresses a lot of annoyance and anger. if you prefer, you may simply skip ahead to the pictures or ignore this particular post; i hate to bring anyone down just because i'm having a rant! ]

I've been looking forward to doing my first outfit post! Unfortunately, all I have for you today is some subpar camera-phone pictures (they're not all like that, I promise!)

It was done sort of hastily because I wanted to make a point. To make that point, I have to share a brief story about my day.

In my house, I'm basically resident cook. I love putting together the grocery lists and shopping for my family. I'm responsible for dinner most nights, and I'm usually baking treats on weekends. That's all fine with me!

Today is Wednesday--at my neighborhood Sprouts, that means double the discounts. Everyone goes on Wednesdays. I enjoy Sprouts for their wide variety of affordable health foods; with a diabetic brother at home, I have to get creative! There I was, meandering around, sampling the free coffee and generally enjoying my day. I'd just come from signing paperwork for my new job (!) and I felt pretty excited, so naturally, I was in a good mood!

When I brought my items to the checkout, the woman in front of me wasn't too friendly--she scooted my bar over when I tried to start adding my items and glared a lot, but I figured she was probably just having a busy day. The cashier also didn't seem very interested in talking to me, giving short answers and avoiding eye contact. At one point, though, she looked up and suddenly seemed attentive.

"Where do you get those bows you put in your hair?" she asked. I answered happily that I make them. She followed up with more questions about how to put them together, which I was only too glad to answer. I was in the middle of explaining the clips I used (all while my items were still being scanned) when suddenly, I was interrupted.

"You do realize that those little bows make you look like you're about thirteen years old, don't you?" she said, in a tone I didn't consider to be the most friendly. I was at a loss for words, as this was the second time this week someone had so rudely commented on the way I looked (which I'll get into in a second). The cashier and bag boy both started laughing, at which point the cashier said, "yeah, I didn't know how to ask without being rude, but how old are you?"

"Twenty-one," I answered, trying very hard not to let my weariness at this question show.

"So you're legal and everything and still walking around dressed like that?" the lady behind me pressed. The laughter continued from all sides. I don't really remember anything else--I didn't answer back, I think I just smiled and tried to laugh politely. I paid for my items as quickly as possible before leaving to go find my car.

Let me explain a few things, because this situation comes up a lot. The responses I get are always the same, and I'd like to address them.

"Just say something rude right back! Tell that old bag her outfit made her look about twenty pounds heavier and see how she likes it! That'll shut her up!" 

I'm not the kind of person who will genuinely say something rude. I try very hard to maintain the politeness I was raised with. Even when I can think of anything truly snappy, nine times out of ten I won't say it. The woman behind me was wearing a very garish leopard-printed suit, and the first thing that came to my mind out of anger was that someone ought to tell her those hadn't been relevant since the 70's. Even as she was drawing all of this unwanted attention to me, I immediately felt bad for thinking so harshly. Obviously, she liked her outfit enough to wear it out, so who was I to judge? For all I know, this style is completely fashionable. I don't claim to be the most modern, and I probably don't know what I'm talking about anyway.

"Just take it as a compliment! You'll be thankful for those kinds of comments when you're forty!"

I hate this. I'm sure this is true to some extent--my grandmother and mom are living proof that this isn't going to stop anytime soon. However, the fact of the matter is, I'm not forty. I'm a twenty-one-year-old who has accomplished things I'm proud of. I consider myself to be fairly intelligent. Despite being occasionally down on myself, I know I have nice traits to offer. I don't think I should take someone's blatant rudeness as a compliment, especially when they don't mean it to be one.

"Don't take it so seriously!" 

I dislike this even more. For some reason, comments like this are written off by others, and I'm expected to simply ignore them. However, I don't see why it should be acceptable for anyone to take the time out of their day to interrupt what another person is doing just to say something negative. The only time I go out of my way to speak to someone I don't know is to compliment them. It's a foolproof way to make someone's day better. You're almost guaranteed a more friendly response if you say something nice. While many prefer to dismiss my feelings as dramatic, I feel that this is a form of harassment, especially if you continue with it despite visibly making the other party uncomfortable.

"Well, what do you expect with the way you dress? If you want some respect, lose the bows and put on some makeup!" 

This is my least favorite response of all. It completely shifts the blame from the person who was deliberately being hurtful to the person who was trying to happily go about their day. The fact of the matter is, I like  how I dress. It's true that I don't wear any makeup, and I will continue not to as long as I like. Am I better than other women who enjoy makeup? No! Am I worse? No! It's a personal preference, and I feel uncomfortable wearing it. Why would I change that just to please other people?

I enjoy the fact that I only own two pairs of pants and that all my dresses are printed. I'm proud of having a collection of patterned tights and being able to make my own hair accessories. I have a huge appreciation for vintage styles, and having fun emulating the colorful styles I admire so much is my favorite pastime. Your style is how you choose to express who you are--we've all heard it on What Not To Wear, and it's true. I don't blindly clip bows I make by hand into my hair and think, "goodness, I hope nobody realizes that I like cutesy things!" The truth is, I have this newfangled notion that you deserve the same amount of respect no matter what you look like. I can't stress this enough. Someone could be running around the store naked and you still wouldn't have the right to judge them on how they looked. You simply wouldn't, because it has no bearing on who they are. I shouldn't be any less deserving of respect because of what I was wearing. That's the mentality that you see all too often in more upsetting situations--victim-blaming. "Well, she was assaulted for no reason, but what was she wearing?" "Well, you were harassed while you were out enjoying an evening with your friends...but what were you wearing?" It doesn't matter. This is a very unhealthy mentality that too many people seem to share. Call me over-dramatic all you like. I refuse to perpetuate the idea that anyone deserves to be treated as less because of how they look.

This is becoming a serious problem for me, as people have always thought I looked young. You may or may not realize from looking at me that I'm actually a college graduate who's going to become a diplomat someday. You may not realize that I've been known to curse like a sailor on shore leave. You may not know my struggles or insecurities or wishes or favorite books. You'll never know unless you learn to ask me instead of going off of appearances alone. I can't help it if I look young forever--that's half the reason I refuse to turn to makeup. I don't want to force something that isn't there. Thousands of women I know have perfected their usage of products to enhance their already pretty features, but for me, personally, it would serve as more of a disguise and less as a complement. And that's okay.

What isn't okay is being expected to choose between being taken seriously and changing who I am.

It took a long time to get here! I'm not going to erase all of it and start over just because some people think that printed dresses and hair-bows make me less worthy of respect. For anyone who's encountered the same problems, don't let it make you change, either. I think some people are truly intimidated by the bravery it takes to be your true self. Who knows?

For anyone who's wondering, this was the offending outfit.

Bow: Handmade proudly by yours truly.

Shirt: Forever 21 (it has bunnies on it! How can you get angry about that?!)

Shorts: Forever 21 (I bought these on sale a long time ago)

Shoes: Old Navy 

I'm sure that woman didn't realize that I made my bow at the same time as I made a matching one for my dear long-distance friend. She probably didn't consider that my mother had picked this shirt out while we were shopping together one day, and she'd been so excited about it that I had to buy it. It always reminds me of her. Of course, I don't expect strangers to be mind-readers, but doesn't it make sense to assume that if you're going to criticize someone you don't know, you may be insulting them on a deeper level than you realize?

I plan to post countless more outfit pictures over however long I keep this blog. If my style ever changes, it will be because I decided it was time for something different, not because enough people finally made me realize I looked like a young teenager. The people who matter love the way I look--and, what's more, they love me. 

I'm sorry this turned into such a novel. Anyone who has had similar experiences can attest, however, that it only becomes more disheartening with time. It can truly be unfortunate how many people feel the need to go out of their way to bring others down.

Has a similar situation happened to you? What did you do? How do you feel about this kind of thing? I'd love to hear!